Bad plastic surgery or not, how can your nipples not be hard when hanging out with a guy like this. This dude must have some major bank because even a celebrinobody like Tara Reid has certain guidelines that she follows when choosing a fuck buddy. I’m pretty sure at this point it’s either you’re filthy rich (or trick her into thinking that) or have the ability to get her a part in “American Pie 7: 90 minutes of pie humping because this movie franchise isn’t funny anymore”.