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Unless someone finds a way to pry the bottle of Jack away from my Kung Fu grip this weekend, that’s it for another week. But before I shut it down, I want you to remember these three things…

  1. There’s a 50% chance that your dad is getting laid this weekend, and a 75% that it won’t be with your mom.
  2. You should help stimulate the economy by going out tonight, getting blasted, and charging the whole tab to your credit card. But don’t tip the bartender because you’re going to give Citibank a 20% tip instead.
  3. You’ve just spent another week having accomplished nothing. The least you can do is make a fat chick happy and have sex with her. Maybe even sleep over so she can cook you breakfast in the morning while her 15 cats crawl all over you.

So that’s it for the Danny Devito of calendar months. After the break, I’ll leave you with some photographic evidence that your girlfriend likes chicks.

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night court

Boston.com

An assistant clerk at the Chelsea District Court was arrested by the FBI this morning on charges that he had sex with an accused prostitute in an empty courtroom while promising to help get a charge against her dismissed.

James “Jim” Burke, 41, of Chelsea, made a brief appearance this morning before US Magistrate Judge Timothy S. Hillman, who released him on $10,000 unsecured bond and ordered him to return to federal court March 26 for a probable cause hearing.

This guy obviously never watched an episode of “Night Court”. Everybody knows that all of the hanky panky is supposed to go down in the Judge’s chambers while he’s down in the cafeteria eating Jello with Bull Shannon.

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Dennis Wideman

Dennis Wideman of the Boston Bruins doesn’t look so tough. At least not when he’s dressed as a Teletubby.

I’m assuming this is like how right guys can wear pink dress shirts, because they have so much money that they don’t give a shit what anyone thinks. It’s either that or the Boston Bruins are having some issues in the marketing department and really trying to stretch their fan base.

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Hot or not 56

You know the drill. 5 stars for hot, 1 star for not. Plenty of pics for you to pass judgment on after the break.

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Ask A Hot Chick: RuthUK

Posted by Don Chavez in Babes

ruth uk

You know what’s a sure fire way to get yourself published in the “Ask a hot chick” segment? Send in pictures that I have to censor. It gets a hell of a lot more attention than sending in some mirror shots from your Myspace profile.

So today’s interview is with Ruth, aka RuthUK of Candy Crib. Ruth seems like a really cool chick that hates to wear clothes. After the break, more pics of Ruth, and find out what naughty club Ruth is a member of.

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