Son Dies And Mom Wins Legal Battle To Keep His Sperm

This post earned it’s WTF tag…

AUSTIN, Texas (AP) — A judge has granted a mother’s request to have someone harvest sperm from her dead son’s body, so she can have the option of carrying out his wish to have children.

Nikolas Colton Evans, 21, died Sunday at a Brackenridge hospital after being punched and falling outside an Austin bar March 27.

His mother, Marissa Evans, told the Austin American-Statesman newspaper that he wanted to have three sons someday and had even picked out their names: Hunter, Tod and Van.

“I want him to live on. I want to keep a piece of him,” she told the newspaper.

What ever happened to keeping a lock of someone’s hair?

Evans and her attorneys were trying on Tuesday to find a urologist or other medical professional willing to collect the sperm for a possible surrogate pregnancy in the future.

Really? I can’t believe they’re having trouble finding someone to jerk off the dead guy? If they’re smart someone will volunteer before this grieving mother takes matters into her own hands. Literally.

Might I recommend trying Craigslist? I’ve already written the ad…

Wanted: Someone willing to extract sperm from a very stiff gentleman – w4m or m4m – (Austin, TX)

I know it’s last minute, but there is a gentleman in need of sperm extraction. Very stiff, not hot at all, don’t expect him to reciprocate.

You must be willing to work in a cold, refrigerator like environment, and be able to work quickly.

Swallowers need not apply.