OLYMPIA, Wash. — An instructor at The Evergreen State College has been arrested on voyeurism and indecent exposure accusations, police say.

Campus police arrested Brian Walter, 35, a member of the faculty at the Olympia college on Wednesday, police told KIRO 7 Eyewitness News South Sound Bureau Chief Richard Thompson.

A witness told police he saw Walter masturbating in the men’s shower in the College Recreation Center locker room on Tuesday while staring at two other men who were showering, according to a police report.

Brian Walter is clearly of a victim of good hygiene. I’m having a hard enough time wrapping my head around the fact that an institution called “Evergreen State” has showers, let alone multiple people who use them. Walter’s lawyer is going to have a field day with this one.

Your honor, my client was washing his dick with soap. Is that a crime? There was no sign at the facility indicating that dick washing was prohibited.

Oh wait, he’s gay? He’s totally fucked. Apples to apples, you throw a straight guy in the shower with a bunch of chicks and he’s gonna spank it. You throw a gay guy in a shower with a bunch of dudes and he’s gonna spank it. Look it up, it’s a fact. That’s just how these things work.

Now here’s food for thought. Let’s say he’s guilty and is sentenced to prison, where he’ll be showering with other men. Is that really punishment, considering that’s what will have put him there in the first place? I think not.