A new study shows that for husbands and wives alike, the more housework you do, the more often you are likely to have sex with your spouse.

Earlier studies have hinted at this connection for men; the sight of a husband mopping the floor or doing dishes sparks affection in the hearts of many wives. But the more-housework-equals-more-sex link for wives, documented in a study of 6,877 married couples published online recently in the Journal of Family Issues, is a surprise.

Scrubbing the floor is no aphrodisiac, and seeing your spouse doing it usually isn’t either. “My husband loves doing laundry, yet I don’t get any thrill out of his doing it,” says Chicago writer Julie Danis. And “I don’t think he thinks it’s sexy when I go around gathering the detritus of his daily life.”

Nice try assholes, but I’m not falling for this. I’m not even married and I already know how this song and dance routine works. The chick hopes that by doing all the housework, you’re ass will be too tired for sex. Then when you wake up, elbow her and say “honey look, it’s morning wood, don’t let it go to waste”, she’ll give you some bullshit about having to clean some more because it’s a new day and the housework/sex clock has been reset.

You want to get laid? Make money. Lots of it. There’s nothing that turns a chick’s panties in Niagara Falls more than a big bank roll. I don’t care if you’re fat, lazy, ugly, micro-dicked, and never brush your teeth, if you’ve got lots of money you can get laid any time you want.

I know, it’s revolutionary thinking.

h/t WSJ

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