We’re on the cusp of the NFL playoffs. That is important for two reasons. First off, it lets us know who the best team in the league is via the Super Bowl. That’s really good. Secondly, it means that we are marching to the Pro Bowl, the worst all-star game in the history of sports. It’s really terrible stuff. They might as well play the game with 22 punters. That would actually be hilarious and more fun. Call it the “Punter Bowl.”
So a bunch of people are upset because the BBC put up a “Faces of Women” end-of-year bullshit post, and for December they included a panda’s face. THE NERVE! PANDAS AREN’T WOMEN! FEMALE PEOPLE ARE WOMEN! Rachel Maddow got really upset, which is a pretty good indication that this isn’t very important. If you would like to get involved in this debate….just don’t.
I don’t know how old Brooke Burns is, but she doesn’t look a day over 14! Wait. That sounded really creepy. What I meant was that she looks very young. She must take very good care of herself, doing all that paddleboarding and whatnot. Keep it up. And keep it up while wearing a bikini.
Possible New Years resolution: Get better in dealing with women. Namely, get better at picking them up. Made Man is feeling sorry for you, so they’re gonna throw you a bone in the form of this guide, in the hopes that you can toss a bone of your own. Ugh. That was cheap. I’m not better than that, but I really want to be.
Sure, it’s been a few days since Christmas, but stoners probably aren’t even aware of that. Just tell them it’s a birthday present. While it might not be the most ethically solid gift, getting someone drug gear, it’s pretty clear that these items will get used. Pair this gift with some food.