“SHAKIRA!, SHAKIRA!” Here she is in Miami. I swear to God, I’m pretty sure every hot chick in the world is in Miami right now. And I’m freezing my ass off. I got frostbite in my mustache. Half of it had to be removed. I look ridiculous. But this isn’t about me. It’s about Shakira. Did you know she is only 4′ 11″? And she’s bendy. Just sayin’.

After the break see the rest of the pics…

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