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I hope everyone is making the most of this leap year day. I’m currently in bed, pantsless, debating whether or not I want to get up and get some water. Needless to say, I’m embracing the “carpe diem” philosophy like never before. Make the day yours! Even if that means not getting out of bed and yelling at people who ring the doorbell to go away and never come back.

Happy Leap Day, y’all!

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Jeisa Chiminazzo

Take that, Victoria’s Secret! La Perla is here to outclass you guys with lingerie that’s 10X as expensive. And you they’ve got the modeling talent to back it up with Jeisa Chiminazzo, a Brazilian model who can totally go head-to-head with Candy and Lily. Wouldn’t you agree?

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Katie Cleary

She’s got a very intense look about her. That may turn off a lesser man, but rest assured, I’m not a lesser man. The fact that these photos

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Megan Fox

Yeah, yeah. She’s hot. More importantly, who’s that tattooed douche she’s hanging out with? I know she has a thing for tattoos, but couldn’t she go with someone more subtle? For instance, I have one tattoo on my shoulder. It’s beautiful and understated. WHY CAN’T YOU LEARN TO LOVE ME, MEGAN FOX?

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Some people just can’t handle their drugs. This girl just can’t for the life of her figure out what is in her mouth and why it’s in there. Also, she seems to get kind of whiney when she’s on painkillers. IT’S GAUZE, LADY! TRY TO REMEMBER THAT. Nevermind. We’ll remind her in 14 seconds when she asks again. Maybe they should have just left those teeth in there.

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