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Joshua Shelton, a Maryland resident and drunk, left a party on a Maryland chicken farm only to wake up in a urine-soaked pile (really) on the ground, just under a circuit board. Unfortunately, he had tampered with the circuit board, killing the electricity, which in turn caused the chickens to die over the course of the night.

Why chickens will die over one night without electricity is beyond me. So is the fact that a chicken coop would hinge all its electricity to one damn switch.

Either way, big ups to Josh for exposing many cracks in the American poultry machine.

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After six terrible years, ‘Jersey Shore’ is calling it quits, spokespeople for MTV declared today, as rainbows graced the sky and songbirds filled the trees. It seems as good a time as any as we’re still reeling from the news that Snooki oozed out a baby, and everyone that appeared on the show seemed to lobby for a higher salary and a spin-off show.

Besides, with the hike in oil prices, petroleum products like hair gel are not getting any cheaper.

While MTV hasn’t given us any idea what half-baked reality show will supplant ‘Jersey Shore’, TV audiences can rest assured that it’s gonna terrible.

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Wacky, but this how Sue Austin likes to spend her downtime. Cruising around the ocean floor in her admittedly-badass wheelchair. I don’t really want much more context than that, to be honest. I would just like to take a minute to appreciate that humans are evolved enough that they can want to do something like this, then make it happen.

“Oh, I can’t go to the bottom of an ocean in a wheelchair? I think I can, assbutts…”

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Paula LaBeradas


Expand your horizons a little bit with this Portugese beauty. Ms. LaBaredas may not be more than a B-movie actress and model professionally, but…hmmm. I should have had a better idea of what she’s good at. She’s incredibly hot and we can see her butt, which I think is really nice.

She also doesn’t seem to shy away from attention, which is a nice quality for a model to have.

After the break see the rest of the pics…

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Abby Clancy

That footballer Peter Crouch is one lucky guy. He gets to come home to this vision every night. Abby is a catwalk model, but more famous for being famous. Which is a little messed up, because she should be more famous for being hot than being famous. Whatever. These things are confusing. Here she is in Majorca. ENJOY OR ELSE!

After the break see the rest of the pics…

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