Don Chavez

Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro continued to hold steady at the University of Pennsylvania’s New Bolton Center on Thursday, a situation that chief surgeon Dr. Dean Richardson expects the colt could maintain for weeks as he recovers from fractures and laminitis.

Yesterday, he had a massive bowel movement and left a big steaming pile of shit on the ground.  Oddly enough the specimen contained a New Jersey license plate.  Doctors hope that this is a sign that his appetite is increasing, and he will eat anything aside from a helping of Paris Hilton.

Dr. Richardson has promised daily updates on Barbaro’s condition using a color coding system similar to the terror alert system used by the U.S. government.  Today’s level is YELLOW.

I don’t see the point in an update until we reach RED or GREEN, and if Barbaro does die, will ESPN2 cover the funeral?  Who will give the eulogy?  The only person fit to give the moving speech would be none other than Hammerin’ Hank Goldberg.