Don Chavez

Today’s Belmont Stakes looks to be a rather uneventful one, as Casino Drive has officially been scratched. The only thing that can get in Big Brown’s way is ailing hoof, or one of the other contenders deciding to be the enforcer and taking Big Brown out against the rail in some sort of a crazed horse fight.

Now if you are looking for a Big Brown souvenir win ticket, the cost is $2. But if you’re looking to make money, stay away from the win pool. Today we might see the rare occasion where the place and show bet pay just as much (possibly more) as the win bet.

Why?

The reason is simple. The three pools are independent of each other, and every Mary, Suzanne, and Ethel that doesn’t know a thing about horse racing will put their money on the UPS horse to win. Factor in plenty of souvenir money, and you have neglected place and show pools, which will probably be comprised of people who bet Big Brown across the board (win, place and show).

Don Chavez, you sir are full of crap!

Hey, eat a donkey dick! If you do your homework and look at the 2004 Belmont you’ll see that Smarty Jones would have paid 35 cents on the dollar to win (he came in second), and you received 65 and 30 cents on the dollar for the place and show bets.

But I want to get rich today. How do I do it?

My first suggestion would be to start a prostitution ring. As long as you bribe the fuzz to keep them off your back, you’ll never go out of business. There’s great cash flow, and if you land your girls a few high end clients you could get a book deal some day down the road when you retire.

If you are looking to get rich today by playing the ponies, I suggest that you play the pick 4. Big Brown is the free bingo spot, so you’re essentially playing a pick 3. A long shot or two is bound to win in the undercard before the Belmont Stakes, and it would send your odds on Big Brown skyrocketing.